Love Street, Selcuk, Turkey

G-strings, gypsy pants & good times in Selçuk

When I stepped off the bus in Selçuk, my friend was already there waiting for me. I’d met him a year earlier, the first time I came to Turkey, and we’ve kept in touch ever since. He recently opened up his own guesthouse and that’s where I’ll be staying for a few weeks.

On the walk there we made small talk as he pulled my luggage for me. It was kind of weird seeing him again after a year’s time and I was hoping our reunion wouldn’t be too awkward.

I was looking forward to having a real friend to hang out with. Someone I didn’t have to worry about trying to sleep with me or that was looking to get into a relationship. I just wanted to chill and have fun.

When we arrived at the guesthouse, I was ready to go straight to my room, drop my stuff and shower but instead Ahmet led me downstairs into a garden area and told me to wait there while he made us coffee.

As I waited, I let out a huge sigh of relief. I felt more relaxed already.

Over Nescafe and Winston Blues, we sat and caught up. He invited me to eat dinner with him, some friends and family this evening to which I happily accepted. A real home cooked family meal?! Say no more!

“Ok, now you can go to your room,” he said as he handed my the key. “And, oh, make sure you go up to the top floor and check out the rooftop!”

Rooftop?!? Heck yeah!

I decided the shower could wait. I quickly dumped my luggage in my room then headed upstairs to have a cigarette and check out the view.

It was absolutely amazing! A whole 360 degree view of the town! Green stretched before me as far as the eye could see.

A view of Selcuk

There was even a view of the town’s Byzantine castle!

Selcuk view of castle

“I’m so happy to be back in Selçuk!” I exclaimed with glee to nobody but the street cats that were skittering across the red-roofed tiles of nearby houses. It was so peaceful up there. And I loved breathing in the fresh countryside air. I will definitely be coming back up here tonight to see the stars!


At nine o’clock it was finally time for dinner. I sat next to Ahmet and tried to remember the onslaught of Turkish names as he introduced everybody to me.

The table was set with fresh gözleme (Turkish flat bread-sort-of-thing made on a special griddle) with feta type cheese and spinach inside, boiled greens and potatoes, grilled köfte (meatballs for the meat eaters), and tomato-cucumber salad. It was the best meal I’ve had in days! Real-home-cooked-food!

Finally, for once, I was satiated.

After dinner we all pitched in to help clean up. In between cleaning, Ahmet, his friend Metin and I shot the shit and joked around. It reminded me of hanging out with some old guy friends I had back home, which is something that I miss. We decided that we were going to get some alcohol and chill.

“What kind of wine is good around here?” I asked.

“DIKMEN!!” they replied in unison.

I laughed. “What’s it called??? Dick man?” and they started laughing. They told me it is an inside joke around here that whenever a foreign woman says she wants to have wine, they recommend the Dikmen, because to them it sounds hilarious!


At the corner store I did buy a bottle of that trusty ol’ Dikmen and they bought a bottle of vodka. We hung out in the garden area, drinking, smoking and having a great time, talking about funny cultural differences and pondering some of life’s questions like the purpose of G-strings and reason for the saggy crotch on Turkish gypsy pants.

Saggy-crotch gypsy pants

(No one came up for a valid reason why either of these things exist. They still remain a mystery.)

“You would look good in these pants,” Metin told me, laughing. “I am going to get you some!” Now I started laughing, trying to picture myself in said pants without looking like a total dork, not knowing how I’d maneuver the eight extra inches of crotch.

“Haha, yeah ok! My favorite color is green. But I can’t promise you I’ll wear them!”

His friend and I were on a roll, talking about everything – from politics and religions to spirituality and the meaning of life. We definitely had a vibe going. I think by this time Ahmet was too drunk to participate in such heavy subject matter, because he told us he was bored and headed to his room.


When he was gone, Metin looked at me and said, “I cannot believe you are sitting here talking these things with us. I have never met a girl that does this!” I could tell he was infatuated with me. I mean, I liked him too, he was cute and we talked about some pretty amazing stuff.

“I really like you and I don’t want to lose my chance with you,” he said, gazing at me through his hooded-eyed vodka haze. “You won’t, I just don’t want to move too fast,” I said, not wanting to have another Blue Eyed Boy experience.

I was ready to turn in for the night, because by that point, I had smoked almost a pack of cigarettes (trying to keep up with them!) and drank almost a whole bottle of wine by myself. Needless to say, I was a bit shitfaced.


I hoped as I got up I wouldn’t do something stupid like bust my ass in front of this guy. I told him I was going to head to my room. Luckily, I managed to maintain my composure as I stood up to leave. (Whew!)

Before I could take a step, he quickly stood up in front of me. “Wait.”

Then he kissed me.

Now, this kiss was nothing like the rough, trying to lick my tonsils “kiss” that was Mr. Blue Eyed Boy’s MO. No, this was sweet, gentle, and nice.

And I was really feeling him… until he grabbed my hand and put it on his d*ck.

I was totally taken aback. Didn’t I say I wanted to take it slow? I laughed it off and said “good night” as I started to walk away.

“What time are you having breakfast? I want to have breakfast with you.”

All I was thinking was, ‘Oh my God! I have to pee so bad!

And then, “Do you understand? I’m changing my whole life for you! I’m not going to work tomorrow so I can spend my whole day with you.”


Turkish stop sign ~ photo by Dickelbers on Wikimedia CommonsCC BY-SA 3.0  

Slow down, homie!

“Nooo! Do not do that!” (I tend to resist at the first hint of something sounding potentially smothering) “I’ll be here a while. We have time to get to know each other!”

Then he looked me in the eyes and with the most sincere look on his face said, “I would tell you that I love you because I feel like that, but I know it is too soon for you.”

What?! We only hung out for three hours! 

I let him walk me to my room. He persistently tried to get me to invite him in. I had to pee so bad and was tired of explaining why I wouldn’t let him in, that I kind of just shut the door on him so I could relieve myself already.

I’m a bit surprised at how Turkish guys have been so open and upfront about their feelings. It’s kind of charming and makes them more attractive to me in a way. What woman doesn’t want to be flattered like that? However, I do wonder about the impulsiveness of it all.

It is refreshing, though. I mean, in my experience, getting an American guy to tell you how he feels about you is like pulling teeth!

BUT…  I am not used to moving so fast.


I fell into a deep drunken slumber and didn’t wake up until about 11am the next morning. I was horribly hung over from last night’s debauchery and wasn’t in any shape to face anyone, let alone Metin.

Trying to get out of bed, I realized that I have to stop smoking so much. Since I have arrived in Turkey, my smoking habit has increased to almost a pack a day (not counting the cigarettes freely distributed among friends or good company) and I feel like I am going to die.

The Italians have a phrase “fumare come un turco” which means to “smoke like a Turk” and I had no idea what that really meant until now. 

Sleeping in so late, I totally missed breakfast. I wasn’t complaining though. I didn’t want to see him again so soon, especially looking and feeling all tore up. And I wanted some space.

I did need some coffee though. Too tired to put any makeup on, I gave myself a quick once-over in the mirror, threw on my sunglasses and was ready to head downstairs. Stumbling out of my room, I almost tripped on something in front of my door. I looked down to see a rose placed on top of a plastic bag.

When I opened it, all I could do was shake my head and smile.

Inside the bag was a pair of lime green gypsy pants.

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